5 WORTHLESS SKATEBOARD PRODUCTS

1. WHEELBONE

How can we make some money off the popularity of skateboarding?
Well we could invent thing rubbery dildo thing that you put over your board that stops the wheels from working,
adds some weight and gets in the way of fliptricks and grinds.
But that doesn’t seem like it would help people at all…..
Exactly.

2. STREET PADDLE

Worthless.

3. SKYHOOKS

You hope the people that buy this realize what dumbasses they are when they frantically try to get their feet out of the straps going 50 down the highway. Whoops!

4. SKATEBRAKE

I’ve seen mangled pipe cleaner art projects that look better than this.

5. MAGNET SKATEBOARD

180.180.180.360.360.180.180. YAY!


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Words: James Lee
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Comments

  1. holycrail:
    • admin:

      “I had heard these rumors, you know way on the underground, about people using magnets, just to get that extra edge”

  2. Mike:

    Seen one of these kooks in Phoenix a while back. Face palm city…

  3. alix:

    don’t forget “Z-ROLLER” trucks!!!!

  4. Alex Wolstencroft:

    Well the one for number 4 isn’t technically skateboarding it’s cement bobsledding and is actually kind of cool cause I did this on a big hill when I was a kid and picked up too much speed for my feet to slow me down and I ate shit pretty hard after the hill bottomed out. Seems like a cool invention to me. The guy probably made a few thousand dollars from it XD.

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