1. WHEELBONE
How can we make some money off the popularity of skateboarding?
Well we could invent thing rubbery dildo thing that you put over your board that stops the wheels from working,
adds some weight and gets in the way of fliptricks and grinds.
But that doesn’t seem like it would help people at all…..
Exactly.
2. STREET PADDLE
Worthless.
3. SKYHOOKS
You hope the people that buy this realize what dumbasses they are when they frantically try to get their feet out of the straps going 50 down the highway. Whoops!
4. SKATEBRAKE
I’ve seen mangled pipe cleaner art projects that look better than this.
5. MAGNET SKATEBOARD
180.180.180.360.360.180.180. YAY!
Check out more of the Jenkem Articles.
Words: James Lee
All sorts of crap over on our Facebook
Get brainwashed on Instagram
Related Posts
Comments
Popular
-
KEITH HUFNAGEL ON THE FUTURE OF HUF
We heard a rumor that HUF was going out of business, so we talked with boss man himself to find out.
-
ANGELA WHITE IS BRINGING SKATING’S MOST ICONIC CAMERA BACK INTO PORN
Her 2000s, gonzo-inspired tour de force was filmed completely on the sleek, sexy, grainy VX2000.
-
CINEMATIC DIY BLOODBATH MEETS BRITISH SKATE VIDEO: THIS IS BLOKES
Blokes punches a heavily ringed hand through your screen, grabs you by the throat and rips you into their alternative reality.
-
A FAREWELL TO BLACK SABBATH THROUGH THE LENS OF SKATEBOARDING
Black Sabbath just played their final show last week so we revisited our favorite songs from skate videos to fondly remember and bid adieu.
-
WHO THE FUCK IS LILJERRYSPRINGER?
You might unknowingly recognize his paw prints within the musical aesthetic of Bronze 56K and many more.
January 9, 2024 10:12 am
sd