1. WHEELBONE
How can we make some money off the popularity of skateboarding?
Well we could invent thing rubbery dildo thing that you put over your board that stops the wheels from working,
adds some weight and gets in the way of fliptricks and grinds.
But that doesn’t seem like it would help people at all…..
Exactly.
2. STREET PADDLE
Worthless.
3. SKYHOOKS
You hope the people that buy this realize what dumbasses they are when they frantically try to get their feet out of the straps going 50 down the highway. Whoops!
4. SKATEBRAKE
I’ve seen mangled pipe cleaner art projects that look better than this.
5. MAGNET SKATEBOARD
180.180.180.360.360.180.180. YAY!
Check out more of the Jenkem Articles.
Words: James Lee
All sorts of crap over on our Facebook
Get brainwashed on Instagram
Related Posts
Comments
Popular
-
A GLIMPSE INTO THE PECULIAR WORLD OF GNARLS AND STEVE ROSEN
An unfiltered exploration of fatherhood in modern skateboarding and the drive of a young skater.
-
HANGING OUT WITH ANDREW HUBERMAN, SKATEBOARDER TURNED NEUROSCIENTIST
Curious what it would be like to hang with this guy outside of a stuffy podcast studio? Us too.
-
BEHIND THE BAIL WITH GABRIEL SUMMERS
DUMBASS DISCLAIMER: Due to Gabriel Summers being a nutta, this interview and the images within are not for the faint of heart.
-
ANGELA WHITE IS BRINGING SKATING’S MOST ICONIC CAMERA BACK INTO PORN
Her 2000s, gonzo-inspired tour de force was filmed completely on the sleek, sexy, grainy VX2000.
-
GETTING KINKY WITH DANIEL VARGAS
Daniel Vargas' philosophy on whips, chains and getting choked out.









January 30, 2015 8:53 pm
The Skyhooks crew should be thrown into the FIAH for using Sizzla-Kalonji for their music!!
March 2, 2015 12:05 pm
I had a set of skyhooks and thought they were sweet. Great for nailing round the streets as can hop up kurbs and pull big shiftys and spins. They are not like snowboard bindings. You can slot feet in and out with ease. Best thing I had until my board got nicked. I want to buy some more but can’t seem to get any. Anyone know where I can buy some please?
June 1, 2019 2:32 am
Your post is very informative and it saves me time from these worthless activities. I like skating and whenever I don’t do skating then I do web designing and whenever I stuck in any line problem I usually take help from professional website designers and they help me to get out of this problem.
June 17, 2019 8:21 pm
Hey, some of these products actually useful xD i mean the stick is worthless, the brakes aren’t for skateboarding. However! I’ve actually been looking for something similar or exactly like the sky hook for sometime now. And i already have something like the wheel bone, it’s ment for stationary practice, you’re not supposed to grind with it xD
March 22, 2022 1:15 pm
yes we found the best version https://skateboardwarriors.com/nomad-skateboard-deck-review/