October 24, 2021/ / ARTICLES/ Comments: 9

Back in the saddle again. This was our 10th Tampa Pro, and if Tampa’s known for anything, it’s professionalism. Pro skaters, pro partygoers, pro strippers, and pro lurkers who make unique life choices. Being at a skate event this big and historic can feel like a magical trip away from the real world. No matter how many times you go, you feel little-kid joy in seeing homemade Piss Drunx shirts and realizing that in this special place, there’s no barrier between you and all the pros drinking at the bar, pissing in the alley, and taking over the old brick streets. Tampa Pro is one place where skateboarders can live and party as one.

Meet the good homie and homieette: Semmes aka “@Hugepimp” and Maria aka Skeletor. Last time we saw Semmes we were at an AirBnB in ATL and everyone was on their 3rd day of bad behavior with little to no sleep. Only recently did I find out that he got sober and instead of drinking alcohol he’s addicted to Mountain Dew. Can’t win ’em all I guess.

Fun fact: Kareem‘s son goes to the same small NY upstate college [New Paltz] where Jenkem was conceived. Doesn’t really mean much in the grand scheme of things, but any connection to Kareem is worth bragging about.

At some point during the weekend, it was clear that Kairi Netsuke (left) was the crowd favorite and underdog of the event. He had a crazy run in the semi finals but couldn’t pull it off in the finals, which is why he didn’t place higher. Regardless the crowd was taken by his unpredictable tricks and dialed in but stylish ways. Here he is getting an oil change from his mentor / coach.

If you saw our IG coverage you probably saw the clip of Steve Berra getting really mad at a random group of kids for holding up a photoshopped sign of Jagger Eaton playing with his nipples. The sign was pretty dumb, but Berra got triggered when he could have just moved on. Obviously, Berra is known to overreact, but all the jabs Cariuma was getting throughout the weekend pushed him to the edge. But that’s what you get with a quality footwear brand like Cariuma.*

*Full disclosure: Cariuma sponsored this caption.

It doesn’t matter if it’s your first, your tenth, or your twenty-seventh Tampa Pro, nobody will “cool guy” you at these charmingly grimy bars. As long as you can hold your booze and don’t try to hook up with someone else’s partner, you can pretty much be friends with anyone in a two-foot radius. Some people even let you put a beer on their tab if you promise to ask any question besides, “Contest was pretty sick, huh?”

TJ Rogers was somebody we didn’t know much about but he won over the whole crew over the weekend. His clothes were comically XXXL baggy, he made sure to get 10/10 drunk on Espolon, and at 5 am at McDonald’s he was exceedingly cordial. Real professional, this guy.

You don’t have many options once the bars close. You can either hit the strip club like a sad degenerate, eat McDonald’s till you’re sick, or throw hands with your homies on the sidewalk to get your drunk out. On night one Alexis chose the third option.

By day 3 we were so dead we watched 50% of the contest at home with Hot Pockets. Everyone knows the best thing about traveling is eating shitty-ass food guilt-free.

Cellphones are getting way too big. Look at that shit. That’s a double-D phone!

At night Felipe Nunes got a little twisted and started handing out his leg for people to use as a beer bong / goblet. Mr. Gustavo was one of the brave men to chug a full beer out of that sweaty prosthetic. I guess if your gonna get Covid at least get it in style!

These guys kept all the events running smoothly, so on the last night they deserved to let loose with some refreshing alcoholic beer drinks. This is the last they were all seen alive.

What really fascinated me all weekend was trying to figure out how the woman administering the whippings at the Castle got this gig. She would start off slow and light, but as the music sped up she started to pound on this scrawny dude’s back to the beat. Get paid to whip people in public for 4 hours? Sign me up!

This is freedom. Laid out, middle of the street, voice busted from spending three straight nights at bars with indoor smoking and wearing your favorite caballero hat. It’s no wonder when Europeans first landed on Florida in the 1400s they looked around and said, “Gah damn, this bussin’.”


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  1. had to build spots for his video part

    October 25, 2021 7:03 pm

    i wish someone would just knock berra the fuck out next time he tries that dad shit. so sick and tired of that dickhead thinking he is the moral compass for skateboarding. dude is just a corporate kook that doesn’t even skate anymore. go back to Chicago and stay there!

  2. Malcolm

    October 25, 2021 8:01 pm

    Hey you, doo doo head!
    Don’t you dare talk about Steve Berra like that! He is a good man with a great heart. He’s an excellent father and a generous and inspiring employer. He gives opportunities to so many people and supports the underdog. He’s an incredible skater and has been destroying shit for decades. He’s done it all and then some. He has multiple job titles and is extremely well established in so many areas that people in the skate world don’t even know about. He is a legend and an inspiration.

    • pet

      October 26, 2021 10:47 am

      is that a reponse based in the negative/inverse meme trend?

    • stev beerhead

      October 26, 2021 5:40 pm

      get out of here with that shit, Steve Berra is the exact opposite of what skating needs. Ive never seen someone who takes a joke so pourly. Between him making fake street spots, pushing scientology, and all his other corny bullshit he has become a bitter old clown. Am i suppose to be impressed by multiple job titles or how well established he is? Let me guess you’re a huge Nyjah fan too? This is the same guy who took advertising money from the national guard and us army so they could pump recruitment ads into skateboard mag, the list goes on..too many people have witnessed his fuckery.

      • Edward

        October 27, 2021 12:46 am

        Thrasher had army ads. You know nothing.

        Steve Berra has so many rumours surrounding him, it’s incredible really. If only you knew any tiny bit of truth. He’s an absolute legend in the game and the best dude ever.

  3. Mason

    October 29, 2021 7:52 pm

    Curiuma still sucks

  4. Neil Nice

    November 8, 2021 12:32 am

    Awe man, REEMO! What a LEGEND!

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