As spring approaches and kids everywhere turn to their skateboards to bring them out of their winter slumps, toy companies start hitting the stores with the latest and greatest in plastic gimmicks. The newest monstrosity is MorfBoard, an all-plastic convertible skateboard, balance board, “bounce” board, and *TRIGGER WARNING* scooter.

MorfBoards go for about $100 each and should be popping up like oozing zits at skateparks around the country this summer. The concept behind the product uses the board component of a skateboard as a platform for swapping in components to create other dumb toys. And according to the brand’s website, the four components shown in their Michael Bay style promo video — skateboard, scooter, bounce board, and balance board — are just the beginning of a theoretical “Morf universe” they plan to expand with even more wacky “Xtensions.” Maybe their next “Xtension” can be a pair of metal handcuffs to turn the board into one of those medieval torture devices.

To further solidify their kook level, MorfBoard recently teamed up with a self-proclaimed “AirBoard choreographer” to film a music video/advertisement for his terrible pop song, “Cruisin With You.” In the video, three Nick Carter type guys on a Los Angeles rooftop use their MorfBoards as dance partners as they show you the kind of endlessly embarrassing moves you can pull on the worst skateboard knock off since Ripstiks. Unfortunately, the video cuts out before the dancers got a chance to Morf their ways off the roof.

The MorfBoard isn’t really anything new. It’s just the latest in a long line of atrociously dumb toys trying to siphon off a portion of those sweet sweet skateboard profits. We don’t know how long it will last, but hopefully, a little kid somewhere gets hurt on it soon enough and his mom sues MorfBoard into foreclosure. Until then, whenever a kid asks to try your skateboard, for God’s sake let them try it. You could help avoid the tragedy of them getting into MorfBoarding instead.

Comments

  1. Jmacbt

    March 10, 2018 3:41 pm

    I literally just threw up my granola cereal I had for breakfast a few minutes ago!!! WTF is that??? That’s got to be some corny shit they do over in Europe somewhere -right??? They are notorious for being posers when it comes to American culture but the boy band dancing with skateboarding?? I hope Europeans don’t view our culture like that!! If that’s the case then I’m extremely embarrassed to be an American right now!!!!

    Reply
    • Skatebully

      March 12, 2018 7:49 pm

      you should be embarassed to be an american, period.- Other than that, pretty much everyone agrees that Europe is better at skateboarding, if you exclude sk8 mafia.

      Reply
  2. cockbong 420x69

    March 10, 2018 4:06 pm

    There parents must be so proud. fockin qwers

    Reply
  3. Megan

    March 10, 2018 4:48 pm

    My 8 year old wants this for his birthday this month. We know nothing about skateboards. He thinks it looks cool, of course. Does anyone have any advice for a first time kid? He’s around 100lbs and 5ft tall. Thanks for the article! I’m happy I found it before I bought the Morfboard!

    Reply
    • Honest Dave

      March 14, 2018 6:25 am

      The facts

      These all-in-one type deals never work. That thing is made of cheap plastic and it will not last or function in its intended uses.

      My opinion
      Just get a trampoline, a skateboard and a cheap scooter. And talk to skaters at the park. There is an etiquette to follow wich is mostly common sense but very few 8 yr olds have that

      Reply
    • lothar of the hill people

      March 14, 2018 9:38 am

      that is one huge 8 year old. get that kid a basketball or football or wrestling outfit, any of which are at least slightly less lame than these things.

      Reply
  4. Chillsesh

    March 10, 2018 5:00 pm

    She put a bag on my head…

    Reply

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