Bear with us here, but did you know all of your pro skater idols have a life outside of skateboarding? Wild, right? It’s easy to forget that even the most avid skateboarder has spent more time off their board than on one. So it’s interesting to see how the kind of dogged focus required to enter the upper pro ranks of the skate industry is translated to aspects outside of the stunts and shenanigans that we revere these guys for in the first place.

One such figure infamous for his unbending discipline is Jamie Thomas. We’d heard that the Chief does some kind of hardcore “lemonade cleanse” to get all sorts of toxins out of his body and get himself back to peak performance on a board, but we weren’t sure whether or not to believe the rumor. We knew Jamie was a bit crazy – he makes leaps of faith off buildings for Christ’s sake – but to give up food entirely for two-weeks seemed like a step too far. As someone who can’t imagine the thought of giving up a croissant sandwich and coffee for breakfast everyday, I was curious if Jamie was really nutty enough to do the fast in the name of health – so we called him up and asked.

The rumors are true and, not surprisingly, it’s even more intense than we could’ve thought. We’ll let Jamie do the talking, so tune in below if you want to torture yourself. For your health!

*DUMBASS DISCLAIMER* – We are not doctors, we are lazy skateboarders, so if you do decide to do this, do so at your own risk and don’t try and sue us. Thanks!


More details from The Chief for the psychos out there willing to try this:
I’d like to start by saying this is a 2-week commitment. Please read the first few pages of this text to determine if the Master Cleanse is right for you.
Secondly, this cleanse works great for me, but I am not a doctor and, admittedly, it’s not for everyone.

I prepare 32oz batches of lemonade & drink 2-3 glasses a day.

Recipe for 32oz batch:

– 1/3 cup of fresh squeezed lemon juice

– 1/4 cup of 100% grade B maple syrup

– Fill the remaining of the container with non-tap water

– Sprinkle cayenne pepper on top, shake it up and taste it. You should be able to taste the cayenne pepper, but it shouldn’t be so spicy that you can’t/won’t drink it.

A few pointers:

– It is important that you poop twice a day to release the mucus & toxins stirred up. Keep wipes with you at all times and pack an extra pair of underwear in case you try to fart end up with an oops poops.

– I no longer do the salt water flush as it is brutal going down and very annoying and repetitive coming out. Instead, I drink laxative tea twice a day; at around 9am & 10pm. This send you to the bathroom about 4-8 hours later. ‘Get Regular’ by Yogi tea is by far the best tea I’ve found at the common store. Tastes ok and is not too harsh on the stomach.

– Traditionally, I lose about 1-2 pounds a day and always do the cleanse for a minimum of 10 days. I have done it for up to 21 days.

How to Ease Into It

This step is very important to the whole cleanse:

– Eat raw fruits & vegetables for a day

– All liquid diet for one day; juices smoothies, ice tea whatever, just no food

How to Ease Out of It

– A day & a half of fresh squeezed orange juice (tastes like liquid gold after the cleanse)

– The second half of the second day I eat vegetable soup with rye crackers; sounds lame, but also tastes heavenly.

– It’s also helpful to keep drinking the laxative tea for a few days after, so you don’t get rock hard poo.

Comments

  1. Hal Nugent

    September 26, 2017 4:05 pm

    i’ve done this cleanse many times over the last ten years….between 10 to 30 days at a time. i stopped doing it after i noticed that not only fat is decreased, but muscle mass, mostly after the longer cleanses. if i were to do it again, i would stick to 10 day cleanses. you can also do the salt water flush when you are not on the cleanse….just do it in the morning before eating/drinking anything, make sure you use the right kind of salt, in the right amounts.

  2. Jimmy

    September 26, 2017 5:30 pm

    I prefer the crack, Percocet and beer cleanse. It’s really easy. I learned it from my grandmother. You lose tons of weight and you feel great. You only need to do it for 4-5 years. By the end you lose up to 100 pounds. You smell great too!!!

  3. neko

    September 27, 2017 10:15 am

    This is so stupid, and can be very dangerous. Your body isn’t full of “toxins” and doesn’t need a “cleanse”. Yes, you will lose weight, because you will be vastly calorie-deficient. You will not be “cleansed” or “detoxed” — nor do you need to be — as that is not how the human body works. “Cleanses” are very, very unhealthy.

    The only positive side of this is cluing people into the tasty goodness that is grade B maple syrup!

  4. Peter

    September 27, 2017 3:34 pm

    Neko is totally right.

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