As skateboarding’s popularity grows, mainstream news outlets will continue to try and grab a piece of the action. And in skateboarding, it’s never more apparent and embarrassing when an outsider tries to dive into the culture and really understand “us”. The result is usually a bunch of awkwardly described tricks and some mention of skaters being outlaws or rebels. And then once in a while you get the kooky ones that really just totally miss the mark. These are some of those ones:

1. Mike Mo Capaldi’s Sponsor Me Video Leaves the Vault
So Mike Mo and Spitfire made a pretty hilarious fake sponsor me tape which any skateboarder would know is obviously a total joke. Unfortunately, poor Ms. Gonzalez – an “expert” on skateboarding doesn’t quite catch on, as she dissects it, explaining the reason it is such a “killer sponsor me tape”. Whoops!

2. How to Not Look Too Silly on a Skateboard
This one should really just be entitled “How To Look Like A Longboarder Kook In 5 Easy Steps”. The best part is when the author suggests buying “new skateboard technology” like Crash Pads, which is padded underwear. You mind as well wear a diaper and stuff yourself with some tampons at that point.

3. How to Attract a Skater
The fact that there are articles out there aimed at the “tween” demographic about how to attract sk8rs just shows how far we have come.

4. If You Like To Skateboard I Hope You Never Have Children
This college grad tried to write a snarky little article making fun of skateboarders, attempting to bring some traffic to this shitty Long Island news blog. Instead he ended up getting a bunch of death threats and ended up having to apologize to the entire skate community. Sorry buddy!

5. Skateboard Slang – How to Use Skateboarder Slang
It’s hard to continue reading after the author starts defining the differences between “Stoked” and “Sick”.

Comments

  1. da kid

    October 22, 2012 11:11 pm

    it really doesn’t get any better than article #1
    that dumbass mom… cheez.

    Reply
  2. doc

    January 22, 2013 5:44 pm

    the washington post has done some really bad skate articles in the past. i remember not too long ago some intern at the post interviewed me for some mock story, it was pretty much just me talking shit about park police in dc and freedom plaza. i told her about a ticket i got from them that i didnt pay and how i cant get caught by them or theyll take to there shitty park jail, and how my friend got his teeth knocked in and got a concussion from a park cop pushing him face first into a marble ledge and the cop not giving him his badge number. damn that was a good day i got hear number and skated freedom for hours by myself. and lets just say the washington post would never put out a real article about the terrorizing park police vs. the 15 year old skateboards that roam the street of dc.

    Reply
  3. Tom Roche

    February 12, 2013 7:15 pm

    Haha the article on Mike mo’s ‘sponsor me tape’ is pure gold! Thanks for posting.

    Reply
  4. Mike

    May 2, 2013 4:02 pm

    I could go for some butt pads.

    Reply

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