You know those cocky bastards who challenge you to a game of skate as soon as you get to the park or spot? They got their tre flips down and some bigflips and they think they hit the big time. Well here’s 5 easy tricks, guaranteed to shut those dweebs down. Of course you could always gettem with sex change, pressure flip n double flip variations but don’t be surprised when everyone in the park starts giving you filthy looks and calling you a bitch.

1. Front Shov
This foundational trick is gonna weed out the suckers right away, shutting down the kids that think they deserve a sponsor because they just learned mobbed laserflips off a Youtube video. Since it’s easier switch for a lot of people, you should get them off guard right off the bat, and lay an easy S for “sorry shithead.”

2. Fakie Heelflip
Having fakie heelflips on lock is like trying to not jerk off for a week. You might have it under control for 1 or 2 days, but you always end up losing it and it’s just frustrating as hell.

3. Fakie Varial Kickflip
Varial Flips have been out of style for a while now, but since every single maniac is just practicing “tres” these days, this forgotten little trick becomes a deadly blow. Going fakie insures that they inevitably over rotate their board, bringing you one step closer to oh sweet victory.

4. Switch Varial Kickflip
This trick is a 100% letter guarantee. Switch Varial flips are done about as often as Shane O’Neil smiles, which is never.

5. Nollie or Fakie 360 Shov
This one you can pick or choose depending if you think they are weaker nollie or fakie. Go in there, spin that shit around and watch them hit their shins because they stepped off or over rotated the trick. Or watch em do it twice if they insist on “Berrics rules brah.” That’ll keep’em off their board for a minute. Assholes.


  1. reenispinkle

    November 23, 2011 10:30 pm

    varial flips are tight. James Lee huffs goat urine socks.

  2. My name is Tom Tom (like the sat-nav)

    November 25, 2011 10:05 am

    my favourite trick for games of skate is the kicklfip handstand pogo

  3. Lurking Class CEO

    December 3, 2011 1:21 pm

    it’s kinda funny but as an old dude of almost thirty years, I do this shit and put people out. Especially on just plain ol’ regular pop shuv its. and people; always remember, make them pop it if you popped it.

  4. Mommaz

    January 17, 2012 5:00 pm

    fuck this makes me feel good about myself i have 2,4,5 down

    front shoves on the other hand come and go


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