Mark Gonzales: Want to commit a travesty and be shunned by fellow skateboarders? Say something bad about Mark Gonzales. Actually it doesn’t even have to be bad, just next time Mark is brought up, be like, “yeah, he’s ok…” Just by calling The Gonz “OK” will get people to flip the fuck out and talk about how he invented street skating and scribbly artwork. He’s one of those dudes that people automatically know they should say they like regardless of whether or not they know anything about them, kinda like Radiohead or Bob Dylan.


Jason Lee: Another dude who was killing it while you were busy pooping your pants. Anyone under the age of twenty something that claims Jason Lee is their favorite skater is probably lying. The only reason these people rave about how awesome he is, is because they have seen him on TV, making big time screen appearances and oogle at the fact that they can tell people that he’s a former pro skater. They also love to prove to their parents that there is life after skateboarding other then doing drugs or becoming a team manager. Other then that, he has great style, lines and legendary backside flips but it’s not like people really care about this shit because it doesn’t score higher then a 9 on Street League.


Tom Penny: OK, so you saw this clip, where Rob Dyrdek rants and raves about how legendary Tom Penny is and how he “totally shut down this spot”. We know that Tom Penny in his hayday was amazing and is one of the most naturally gifted skateboarders ever. But just because he fucking killed it 10 years ago, doesn’t mean you have to be riding his dick hard in 2011. Translation: You are not any cooler if you like Tom Penny. Especially when his new footage looks like crusty b sides between bong hits. Fuck have you seen his recent shit? Nice N sloppy. What about Extremely Sorry? And you go on Slap and people are still like “LEGEND” or “THIS GUY CAN DO NO WRONG”. Buncha Zealots.
Words: James Lee

Comments

  1. tom

    August 14, 2015 12:13 am

    This is the wackest article on jenkem. Belongs on the ride channel.

    Reply
    • Jenkem Staff

      August 14, 2015 2:38 pm

      Yeah man – it’s not that great an article to be honest, but it is from 2011.. super early and we’ve grown a lot since then.

      Reply
  2. Robbie Kurcz

    September 8, 2015 10:24 pm

    Switch fs flips in Tims… First board I ever bought from a skate shop 19 years ago (had a cheap-o prior) cheech and chong Flip tiny as hell. Yeah that graphic is 20+ years old now. I respect Penny’s new footage. Being 20 didn’t hurt like 30 does. He’s holding up pretty well. Maybe it’s the perma fry helpin’ out hah (credit his sw back lips at Tampa, he did em so easy back then) yeah Robbie Bertino prob did the first one but Penny had em every time.
    My most cherished possession is a grip tape peel with covered with Gonz art. He is super nice in person and is amazing to watch skate still. He frontside Ollied the Paradise Valley park channel, Rune backed him and bs Ollied it. Rune had a huge smile I think he was stoked on backing the OG. It was the Krooked team just showed up, it was a bonus to see Rune. Tranny blasts are way sicker irl.

    Reply
  3. Robbie Kurcz

    September 8, 2015 10:28 pm

    Didn’t Penny and Gonz collide over a car in Slam City or one of those bigger Euro contests at the time?

    Reply
  4. ben mateson

    September 7, 2016 9:36 pm

    Wow this article is Terrible. Who am I supposed to like please tell? Atleast u made 30 cents or w.e. By having me click thus. Good job Ian should promote you.

    Reply