Mark Gonzales: Want to commit a travesty and be shunned by fellow skateboarders? Say something bad about Mark Gonzales. Actually it doesn’t even have to be bad, just next time Mark is brought up, be like, “yeah, he’s ok…” Just by calling The Gonz “OK” will get people to flip the fuck out and talk about how he invented street skating and scribbly artwork. He’s one of those dudes that people automatically know they should say they like regardless of whether or not they know anything about them, kinda like Radiohead or Bob Dylan.


Jason Lee: Another dude who was killing it while you were busy pooping your pants. Anyone under the age of twenty something that claims Jason Lee is their favorite skater is probably lying. The only reason these people rave about how awesome he is, is because they have seen him on TV, making big time screen appearances and oogle at the fact that they can tell people that he’s a former pro skater. They also love to prove to their parents that there is life after skateboarding other then doing drugs or becoming a team manager. Other then that, he has great style, lines and legendary backside flips but it’s not like people really care about this shit because it doesn’t score higher then a 9 on Street League.


Tom Penny: OK, so you saw this clip, where Rob Dyrdek rants and raves about how legendary Tom Penny is and how he “totally shut down this spot”. We know that Tom Penny in his hayday was amazing and is one of the most naturally gifted skateboarders ever. But just because he fucking killed it 10 years ago, doesn’t mean you have to be riding his dick hard in 2011. Translation: You are not any cooler if you like Tom Penny. Especially when his new footage looks like crusty b sides between bong hits. Fuck have you seen his recent shit? Nice N sloppy. What about Extremely Sorry? And you go on Slap and people are still like “LEGEND” or “THIS GUY CAN DO NO WRONG”. Buncha Zealots.
Words: James Lee

Comments

  1. LC

    July 3, 2013 3:44 am

    Was this written by a fucking ignorant 13yr old??? Not only is it inaccurate, it’s also badly written. Tom Penny, Radlands 92′, switch F/S flips of the pyramid, double over head height, when ppl couldn’t even roll switch yet! Then he goes to California for a summer and nonchalantly shuts down every single spot he skates, switch flipping handrails in legendary school lines. If the Internet was around in his day u would understand the enigma.. Same goes for Jeremy Wray etc. whoever wrote this article is and ignorant dumb cunt, who obviously didn’t grow up in those times. Kook.

    Reply
  2. LC

    July 3, 2013 11:06 pm

    Reply
  3. Ranting and raving

    September 26, 2013 9:36 pm

    The author of this article sounds like some snarky hipster fuck. If you were not skating when these guys were killing it then you shouldn’t be writing articles about them cuz you don’t know what the fuck your talking about. Tom penny and mark gonzalez are skateboarding. Doing there own thing and not giving a shit about what’s cool or “trendy” the way skateboarding was intended to be. Not this group think i-phone, street league jock-o fag shit skateboarding has become.

    Reply
  4. pink floyd

    February 6, 2014 2:12 am

    its funny how everybody Thinks that tom penny wasted his talent on drugs his getting old thats normal are you guys stupid or what, no one is pretending to like tom penny he skates Amazing and i will say he still does. this article is fucking bullshit and so is this website

    Reply